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OK, so err... I dont really use this journal anymoer. Ive gone back to using my personal one, failed_fae. So umm if you'd like to get back in touch/keep up with me, feel free to add me there [comment though, so i remember to add you back, either here or in failed_fae). thanks xxx
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I weighed in today despite the biggest b/p in a really long time.

CW: 119, down from 121
BMI: 21.4, down from 21.8

My body measurements are all the same though, which strikes me as weird.

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I feel utterly utterly broken.

I have spent weeks reconciling myself to my figure and to ideas of eating healthy; a gradual progression from anorexic mindset to a normal one. And all gone, in a moment.

Its been a bad week foodwise: the dreams, the b/p (just one). And now,... now, I am just heartbroken. And whats the point in eating if you have no one to eat for? The world will keep spinning, revolving in its ruthless rhythm; waves rippling across salty shores and stars sinking beneath the harsh, hopeful beams of sunlight. So what difference does it make?
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Yesterday was good.
Sandwich - 300
Fruit - 150
Rice & lentils - 700

Plus, 250 cals burnt off, so total: 1150 -250 = 900.

Today
My muscles were aching so bad I could barely walk, let alone do anything else. So, it was a case of, let the bingeing begin! *sighs*
muesli - 200
biscuits + 2 spoons of icecream - 300
spaghetti on toast - 300
tea- 700
chocolate - 100
total> 1600. Eeeeeeep!
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Basic Stats:
Height: 5'2
Weight: 121
BMI: 21.8

Measurements:
Bust: 35 inches
Waist: 29 inhes
Tummy: 32 inches
Hips:34 inches
Bum: 37
Thigs:22
Calves:14
Upper arms:12

Suprisingly, these measurements don't thoroughly appall me. My body is in decent(ish) proportion (bust & hips are about equal) so I am, as the girls pointed out, an hourglass shape. But what a huge hourglass!

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Current Music: Paramore: Misery Business

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Right. Since i have long ceased to use LB, this new journal is going to be my all inclusive place for weight tracking and all that jazz. I haven't decided yet whether to make it friends only, or open to all, since it isnt really my private journal. We shall see!
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